Grab a drink, yeah… I know…it’s Sunday at 10am. Trust me, you’re gonna need it so grab a Bloody Mary and take a seat. I’m going to drop a truth bomb about Full-Time RVing and most of you aren’t going to like it. It’s going to shatter your Instagram #VanLife and #RVLife dreams and leave you in a puddle of angry tears.
One thing I’ve always hated in life was homeowner’s associations. They have so many stupid rules and there is always some busybody nosy ass neighbor that has nothing better to do than to watch everything you’re doing. That’s RV parks in a nutshell, except your neighbor is so close you can hear them fart.
Don’t hang hammocks on trees, don’t make noise after 9pm, no campfires, your RV must be clean, no washing RVs (yeah, so…about that clean thing?), no parking on grass, no barking, no alcohol, the list goes on. Granted, we follow all the rules…well, not the alcohol one because we need that to put up with all this shit…but damn it’s a lot of rules and there’s different list everywhere we go. It’s exhausting. Not to mention, RV Parks are expensive so you’re paying to be governed by all these rules. It’s exactly like a homeowner’s association!!!! We are members of a RV Park Network where we pay a flat fee yearly and it allows us to camp at all the RV Parks in the network. They aren’t campgrounds, heck…most of them aren’t even RV Parks…they’re glorified trailer parks. Many of the sites are seasonal or annual and the sites that are left are janky, tight and unlevel. When we drive for a few hours and pull in we want to relax and have a drink, not play Goldilocks trying to find a site that fits, has working utilities and is level. It’s even more frustrating when we pull into an RV Park that we’re paying a nightly rate for and we have to play games to get setup. Fix yo shit! We’ve been in free/low cost campsites that are in better shape than some of the high nightly rate RV parks we have been in!!!! It is making travel days really hard on us because we just don’t know what to expect when we show up. Pictures on the internet are deceiving!
There is also ZERO privacy in an RV park. When you’re neighbor is pissed at his wife, you know it. When site 301 gave their kid too much sugar, you KNOW IT. Daisy the wiener dog down in 145 has been left alone all day and she won’t stop barking her fool head off. RV parks are the most UN-peaceful places we have ever been to! State Parks on the weekends are even worse! State Parks hold a special place in my heart because that’s how we started camping, so I give the weekenders some leeway. In FL you know they booked that spot nearly a year in advance and they’ve been working all year towards this vacation and damn it if they want to drink beers and play guitar at 1am on Friday I’m going to put my headphones on and ignore it. Go on with ya bad self! Blow off that steam and make a memorable vacation. On a Wednesday, that don’t fly….I need to get up in the morning for work so shut up so I can sleep. Have I mentioned that RVs are paper thin and you can hear your neighbor fart?
Seriously, you can hear EVERYTHING. You’re not being quiet when you have sex. We can hear ALL OF IT. We can also hear your arguments, your dog barking, your kid having a meltdown…everything. I can’t forget that poor family at the state park who had family visit them and stay in a tent on their site. It must’ve been the kid’s first time camping. Starting around midnight for hours this kid screamed BLOODY MURDER right next to my bedroom window. For hours on end he screamed, “I WANT TO GO HOME!” Yeah buddy, me too. Oh wait…
RV Parks and Campgrounds are not peaceful. They are not quiet. Even when you think it’s quiet and you’ve got your chair facing in the lake and you can hear the crickets and you’re reading a book…..hear comes little Timmy, “MOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SUSSSSIIIEEEE HITTTTT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!” It never ends.
What’s the most ridiculous rule you’ve seen in an RV Park? Have you had any crazy obnoxious neighbors? Leave a comment and let us know!